9 Kills that make you go “Damn!”
February 24, 2016 Uncharted
With Uncharted 4 promising to be Naughty Dog’s ultimate release, it’s only right that we do a run through of THEE greatest kills during Uncharted 3 online gameplay! The Uncharted 3 multiplayer mode is a treasure trove for anyone seeking awesome adventure and action-packed fun. It has the intensity of Call of Duty and the lightness of Crash Bandicoot, making it THEE pick-me-up-and-rage game of the year. Did we mention there’s treasure? Oh yes. This can be spent on mods to make your character even more badass.
Put down those D-pads and check it out!
GOING DOWN FOR REAL
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WINNING at number 9, is this goon. He sees that guy just hanging on the edge and runs to him, then runs away, then he comes back and we sit up. It’s going down for real now, right? RIGHT? It goes down better than you could ever expect. Here at number 9, we have gamer offer a kick off and the other gamer replies, “Nope. PULL DOWN!” And then it happens. The magic. The two of them are pulled down/kicked off by each other and both fall to their deaths… because, screw physics. What a kill! Take notes, gaming ninjas! This is how you make us go ‘daaamn!’
What? WHAT? NO! It can’t be as easy as it looks! THIS GUY. Seriously. Has anyone ever made sniping look so effortless? So smooth? No? Neither have we and that’s why he scores the sought after number 8 spot on our list. He just strolls in, and ‘Blam! Blam! Blam!’ He doesn’t miss a single one! Not one bullet is wasted. It’s a freaking masterpiece and we all know it. We witnessed the snipe of our lives, and we owe it all to youuuuu!
This is just all kinds of epic. Dude lurks in a train carriage and spies a baddie on the train parallel to his. As if he does this all the time, he flicks a grenade into the other train’s cabin (can you spell PRECISION? Neither can we.), and a few seconds later, FIRE IN THE HOLE! And he gets his kill. Words fail me. He casually tosses it through a window and BOOM BOOM. I’m in awe.
This kill brings home the hilarity of uncharted and the awesome fact that it doesn’t take itself too seriously. Two unaware baddies are minding their own business when a hand grabs one and pulls him off a ledge. Then a hand grabs the second guy, and pulls him down too. These are always the greatest kills because they never see you coming! Mwaha-*gets pulled down* damn it!
After the first kill, this gamer moves barely a few feet and what follows, is a glorious killing spree. This has got to be the easiest FIVE Not ALIVE, I’ve ever witnessed. The guy just waits for the baddies to stroll in and once he kills one, he moves onto the next and the next and the next! Slam-dunking that Five not Alive medal all the way home. Victory never looked so easy!
Clocking in at a respectable number 4, is this goon. It looks like a totally normal stroll through the shipyard, right? WRONG. This is not your average multiplayer warrior, no sir. Like clockwork, this gamer takes out not one, not two, not three, not even four but, FIVE, let me repeat that, FIVE bad guys in fifteen seconds. We salute you.
Elena sprints amidst the chaos, bad guys here, bad guys there, bad guys everywhere! Leaping from the roof that has a ladder attached to it, and a bad guy on said ladder, it looks like the dude on the ladder is safe… As she lands on the ground, like a ninja, she spins on the spot and takes him out with a single bullet. NOT SAFE!
Here we have a player gaming as Chloe armed with a shotgun. A top kills list that doesn’t contain a shotgun, doesn’t include the top kills. Moving on, she runs through the rain…a bad guy runs past her and just when we think she’s missed him, she rounds the corner and BLAM. Shotguns a guy in the head! The best thing about this is how effortless it is. I mean, it would be different if she had crept up to him and planned it. But nope, “Ooh a baddie—BLAM!”
Here we go, the first in our top 9 kills and we gotta ask…Have you ever started off your game by blind throwing a grenade, hurdling over a wall— and discovering you blew up some bad guy by fluke AND got a medal? Nope? This guy has! And it’s so cool, all we can do is stand there and shout, “HAIL MARY, BATMAN!” This guy tosses the grenade with an “ah-who-cares” style, and leaps over the wall in time to see the bad guy go KABOOM and score a Hail Mary medal!
Our final thoughts
There you have it, the top nine kills that make you go “DAAAAAMN!” in the world of Uncharted. The beta for uncharted 4 shows a game rich with action and humour, and uber potential ass-whooping madness. Though it will never replace its predecessors, it will be a spawning-pit for the funniest and craziest online kills!
And so it goes, the most epic kills that make you laugh out loud or make your jaw hit the ground, have been forever uploaded onto the internets for aliens who will find our planet after it’s ruined, and will watch these clips and read these words and, “Daaamn!”